Sunday 26 October 2008

For Those About To Rock (Fuck Off)

Something is very wrong with the world when people like AC/DC.

In uttering the words "I like AC/DC", you're effectively saying that you have no problem with this:

To a man, they are easily, without any competition, the gimpiest rock band of all time.

Musically, they're every bit as bad as a man in a small girl's purple vest. Ever noticed that you literally never hear anyone mention an AC/DC song that isn't "Highway To Hell", "Back In Black" or "Thunderstruck"? That's because every other song they've released on 15 albums (yep, 15!) is absolutely woeful, and almost indistinguishable from the 3 big singles. As for Brian Johnson's singing - like Mickey Mouse sucking helium after a kick to the balls. Woeful. James Hetfield needs to slam his head against a car door, Taken-style, then go "HUH! Yeah." in his trademark style.

I would honestly rather dook for apples in a chip fryer than listen to any AC/DC album from start to finish.

Take new album "Black Ice" - featuring such classics as "Rock 'n Roll Train", "She Likes Rock n Roll", "Rock n Roll Dream" and "Rocking All the Way". They put more imagination into naming the Saw sequels (Saw II, Saw III, Saw IV, Saw V, Saw VI and... Saw 3D! Hah, see)

Lastly, something I feel has gone unaddressed for far too long now:

What is this man doing?

Duck Walking around stage... In a school boy's uniform. A velvet school boy's uniform.

All I'm saying is, there's no justice in the world when Dimebag Darrell gets gunned down in his prime and Angus Young roams unscathed.

1 comment:

Mark Collins said...

I'd take Angus of Dimebag any day of the week.